Day 14 - Long Haul Healing

Taos, NM to Williams / Grand Canyon, AZ

I'm not necessarily a fatalist, though I do believe our lives unfold based on our decisions. That's to say, while I don't believe we're fated to any one outcome, I do believe we all come to forks in the road and the decisions we make lead us to our eventual outcomes. In that scenario, the possibilities are limitless. And compounding that is the realization these decisions lead us to different people, places, and experiences. Those experiences lead to the choices we make, and now we've come full circle.

Pretty deep, eh? This is what 11 hours in a truck through the high deserts of New Mexico and Arizona will lead you to. Philosophy. The depths of who we are, who we know, who we love, and who love us. Yesterday I wrote about my travel philosophy - planning not to plan. Today I'm writing about why I'm sure that philosophy makes sense (albeit, to me; planners are gonna plan! I get it).

Tomorrow we're exactly halfway through this journey. The Healing Road. Johns Island, South Carolina to Williams, Arizona and the Grand Canyon. I can hardly believe it if I'm being honest. Are we really here? Have we really driven more than 4,000 miles to this point? Is the price of gasoline really $4.75 a gallon? Has my 10 year old son been an absolutely amazing / curious / funny / loving co-pilot? The answer I keep arriving to is "yes". We're doing this. Yes, we are here. And we're still going. 

Yesterday's post was a mea culpa to the readers of this blog. It was an admission that really, I'm out here winging it. This idea, the Healing Road, was something I felt. I acted on that feeling. I followed that feeling. I did what I had to do to make that feeling a reality. Considering the last four months, on my honor I can't recall how we've gotten here. It's been a blur. An objective. Maybe the most important objective of my 49 years, because every single decision has been with him in mind. 

But back to decisions and fates... Yesterday's blog opened a sea of welcome text messages and direct messages for things to consider. I mean, let's be honest - I let the cat out of the bag! Subliminally I believe that was a cry for help. "I've no idea what I'm doing, but we're driving toward the Grand Canyon and if y'all have any recommendations, I'm listening!" So for those of you who have reached out and made suggestions based on past experiences, thank you. Several of these messages have come with a, "I'm sure you're getting suggestions from all sides, but...". 

First, thank you. Thank you for reading. Thank you for considering us. Thank you for taking the time to send such a message. For that matter, thank you for sending ANY message. The feedback I've received since starting this blog has been truly overwhelming and is fuel for a fire that's been smoldering for as long as I remember. This blog is not a chore, it's a pleasure. It's my catharsis. It's a personal evolutionary change the likes of nothing I could have ever imagined. Your comments and considerations are energizing to say the least.

One such suggestion came from my dear friends, Stacey and Jules. These amazing women are also chasing down a calling. They've started a company called "OME Gear" selling a remarkable product called "The Wanderr" - and no, that's not misspelled. Their commitment to this idea has lead them to selling all they have, buying an RV, and taking their product on the road. These decisions have led them to winning an episode of "America's Big Deal", and that's opened them up to contracts with several big-box retailers. They're chasing a dream. There's nothing any of us can respect more than that.

I got to know these incredible women through Sara; she consulted to them through some of their earlier challenges in business and the mutual respect between them all was palpable. Since Sara's passing, Stacey and Julie have kept in touch and often inquire about me and Conor. Humbling to be sure. 

I mentioned Stacey and Jules took their show on the road, right? Well, based on their ongoing travels, these ladies have a well of knowledge around life on the road. After reading yesterday's blog from Taos, the ladies reached out and suggested a unique way of touring the Grand Canyon - via train, leaving out of The Grand Canyon Railway & Hotel in Williams, NM. When I got this suggestion we were just shoving off from Taos en route to the Navajo Four Corners Monument - a worthwhile stop in my opinion. But when we stopped for lunch and learned that the Grand Canyon Railway Hotel was only a measly four hours from Four Corners, I called and inquired about reservations.

Fast forward, we're at the Grand Canyon Railway & Hotel! Eleven hours in a truck through the New Mexico and Arizona high deserts. And it was the best eleven hours in a car I've ever had.

Decisions. Outcomes. Fate? You decide.

The long drive from Taos down into the valleys of New Mexico and then back out into the high desert of Arizona is absolutely breathtaking. The landscape in nearly any direction feels infinite. The sky is absolutely enormous, such that distances become incomprehensible. And in those perspectives comes the realization of just how small we really are. I quickly found myself in a place of deep introspective thought, driving hard at horizons which seemed would never come. Conor would always be on the lookout for any wild animals along our route - most of which was through Native lands on two lane highways - and I was almost completely enamored in the view and where it would take me in my thoughts.

When we arrived to the hotel, it was nearly eleven hours on the road to the number. We checked in, dropped our bags, and headed out to the hotel restaurant which actually is an upscale buffet with a large salad bar, beef tenderloin carving station, tons of sides, and a made-to-order pasta station. To the side of the dining room was a guy performing on an acoustic guitar. By the time we made our way to the table, he began playing "Blackbird" by the Beatles. Both Conor and I stopped and looked at one another. Both knowing just what the other was thinking; this was the only song Sara would sing to Conor when putting him to bed. We both welled with tears and ended up hugging one another right there in the middle of the dining room. It was as strong a moment as either of us have had through this entire ordeal, and neither of us ever said a word.

The Healing Road is less travelled. Thankfully. For all of us. But if you find yourself on it, listen to your friends. They just might lead you to the most amazing outcomes.